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Sasquatch Birth Journal 22011

  • 2.8
The North American Sasquatch is a megafaunal bipedal hominoid, also known as "Bigfoot," "Nuk-luk" or "Woolybooger." Both female and male alike are considered to be highly promiscuous and generally lack discretion in regard to hygiene. The male Sasquatch unceremoniously abandons the female immediately upon impregnation. This leaves the female to fend for herself during the intense seventy-two hour labor period. The standard birthing posture is upright, scientifically referred to as "Inverted Supine" or "Gravity-Fed Style." Traditionally, a tree serves as the midwife; seizing it by its trunk, the female is provided with ample protection, leverage and stability. Once the female's water breaks (approx. six gallons in volume) she seeks out a secluded deciduous tree, its trunk an average of three feet in diameter, thick enough to support the expecting mother and her firm embrace. Typically the female Sasquatch tends to avoid trees of the coniferous variety when making her choice. There are two theories behind this: (1) the sap/tar secretions are a nuisance during the already complicated birthing process; and (2) to avoid exposure to pine nuts (which are considered toxic to the Sasquatch newborn).

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Member Reviews (9)

The miracle of birth, captured for posterity. Breathtakingly beautiful.

2 members like this review
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top reviewer

It's hard to imagine someone creating a more meaningful film than Sasquatch Birth Journal 2.

1 member likes this review
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top reviewer

I think the sasquatch thing may be a hoax. This film of an alleged saquatch birth has not changed my opinion. The image is not clear and it kinda looks like a person in a costume. The sasquatch baby looks fake, too. I'm keeping an open mind, though.

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staff

Contest: Name this baby!

Stupid

Oddest, funniest thing I've seen in...weeks.

No laughs! Slight chuckle at the newborn's first breath though.

I didn’t find the movie funny at all. It's the very first film I've watched on fandor.com so I'm hoping most of the other comedy shorts are more interesting and funny.

Very funny at the end.